I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
