i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
