didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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