We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize