i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
