she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize