He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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