can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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