on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
