Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
