So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
