maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize