apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize