My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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