Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
