I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Randomize
