Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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