she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
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