What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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