i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize