She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.