East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
