I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
3 2 1 whiskey
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Randomize
