THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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