I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i dont even know how to be here
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
