Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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