Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
