the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
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I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
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I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Let the clothes fall where they may.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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