..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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