I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
