I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
