looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
