I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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