spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
