its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
