Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
