We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
