Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
