his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
