question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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