i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
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