I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
