nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
