you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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