so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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