Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
