Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You did what with his pubic hair?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize