Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize