do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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