Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
