yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
